Happy Doing Nothing

It's one of those days when nothing is working out right. E-mails I was expecting haven't showed, I can't get outlook express to recognize my server (or something - I'm not exactly a computer whiz, you know), hence can't send e-mails I need to send, As a matter of fact, it will be a miracle if this post gets published without more glitches. It's one of those days when nothing seems to be working very well. When that happens, I usually do a few things: 1) Like most New Englanders, I blame the weather (very humid today, and promising to be thundery later on, thus affecting all electrical equipment and pastry making). 2) Nothing. That's right. When nothing's working out, I try to do nothing. Or as little as possible. Maybe read and write a little. Get an iced coffee from Dunkin Donuts. Go to a movie. Because when nothing's working out, it's the universe telling us we should slow down. Wait till tomorrow. Maybe the stars are not aligned for our tasks. So we should just wait a little until they are.

So, this week, if you are lucky enough to have a day when nothing is working out, go with that. I know it sounds lazy and it wouldn't be condoned by the Puritans or the Founding Fathers, but believe me, it's okay to sometimes do nothing. Or not much. If you simply have to do something, write about or draw yourself doing nothing. Tomorrow you'll get twice as much accomplished than if you fought today.

Happy Saying "Oh, Well..."

Sometimes we can be beseiged by doubts and anxiety, and in those times, it's important to be able to say "Oh, well," and move on to the next thing. As in "Oh, well, so my 28 year old son wants to come home and live in the basement. It could be worse. I think I'll go plant some bulbs." Or, "Oh, well, I have to count up my change to buy dog food, but everything will work out. Let's go for a walk in the apple orchard!" Because 99 times out of 100, no matter how you worry and fret, things could be worse, and things will somehow work out. It just might take awhile.

So, this weekend, let's practice being zen. Make a list of all your stupid or serious worries. Then burn the paper the worries are written on (safely, or you'll have a bigger worry), all the while breathing deeply and saying "oh, well" on the exhale. Then, take a walk or bake something or putter around in your garden. Then write or draw your burning ritual, and your next move. It will be cathartic, I promise.

Happy Being Sad

All right. Sometimes it's impossible not to feel sad, because of circumstances that are overwhelming in one's life. Someone close dying. Lack of funds for important things. The troubles of friends. Illness. Sometimes we are just sad. It's inevitable. Notice I avoid the word 'depressed,' which I feel is bandied about all too much in our strange culture. Every other ad on TV, in magazines, etc, is directed to depressed people, and promises that a certain drug will fix it. Nobody is allowed to be sad anymore. It's as if the very word has dropped out of our vocabulary. Everyone says, "I'm depressed," whenever they wake up feeling less than perky. When really, they are just sad. Not that depression isn't real, but it's a clinical condition. I fail to see how 59% of the population can have the same clinical condition. If 59% of the people in the US woke up one day with, say, shingles, wouldn't it seem odd? Wouldn't we question how that happened? Shouldn't we be questioning the docs and the drug companies that subsidize them about how this happened, and is it true, anyway?

Excuse my rant. Jumped the track a little. In any case, it's OK to be sad. I give you permission. I'm sad right now because of various factors, but I know I won't be in the future. Things will get better. I'll be happy, at least a few hours a day. Half a day. For days at a stretch. This is just what happens, and I recognize it now. It's a function of aging, I think, realizing that things do eventually change for the better. And instead of moaning about how nothing's ever going to get better, as I used to do when I was younger, I try to focus on how things can be better. What improvements can I anticipate, and what might I do to push them along. Then I try to do some of those things.

So, if you feel sad, stuck, in a bad place, this week, envision how things can be better. Write/draw yourself happier. Write/draw the good things in your life so you don't forget things like, whoa, you're still breathing! Be grateful for the small things. I'll try, too.